Oystermouth Castle

I hate the way they look at me : the old and the young, the men and the women, all with a mixture of pity and mockery in their eyes as they gaze up at my towering, crumbling exterior and touch my ruined innards. To them I'm nothing but a good litter dump site or a cause for melancholy with definitely no saudade.

But they don't know what I've seen. They don't know what I've been through since the time of my creation all those centuries ago : wars and weeping, blood and beginnings, life and death, priests and pilgrims, sickness and health, Kings and Queens, rags and riches, murder and marriage.

And the elements. Oh, the elements! Scalding, sizzling sunlight, cruel murderous cold, raging seas and roaring storms that have made me tremble with fear. And the fires! I can still hear the screams of my final human occupants, even louder than those of the distant dying planes during World War Two and feel the flames eating me up from the inside. I hate fire now, in fact I'm terrified of it.

I love being alone, no messing, no fussing, no fear of being burnt alive, again. That's when Darkness comes out, ancient, deep, dangerous and dancing. She sings to me sometimes with that lovely haunting voice of hers, sings of times and places forgotten by everyone but her. The stars sing to, when they eventually come out in that sweet melodious harmony of theirs, telling me all about themselves and their families. When Moon comes out he never shuts up. He's nice though, always asks me how I'm doing and gets me t open up a bit which Darkness says is very good for me, what with all I've been through.

I miss them when they go. It's only for an average of twelve hours but I spend every second of those hours missing them with all my being and wishing that pesky Sun would go a-bloody-way. She laughs at me and is constantly coming up with new annoying games to play, never realising that her games have and will continue to cause suffering.

Speaking of suffering, I'm undergoing renovation. Worst. Idea. Ever! It was all very well when they were giving me a wash and taking down the suffocating ivory but then they started bringing out the new bricks. Urgh, their worse than Sun and all the human's put together. Their either whinging and crying which I really don't blame them for, not when your being tortured by a drill every five minutes or their preening themselves and making fun of me, never once realising that I'm in constant pain and have seen things that they could never dream of.

Their going to replace me one day. A day that can't come soon enough in my opinion. Let me become nothing but dust. Let me join Darkness, my love once and for all. Let me float amongst the singing stars. Let me talk to Moon for as long as I like. Let me end as a Castle and begin again as Dust, Darkness lover, friends to the stars and Moon and an explorer of galaxies.

Published 5th of October 2016